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2013

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Social support after the death of a child is often thought of as a buffer to help parents with the grieving process. Previous research has focused on grief and support from an individual's perspective but has failed to explore the meaning that couples assign to support and the role it plays in their marital relationship following the death of a child. The main area of focus for this phenomenological study was get a better understanding of the ways that social support is helpful as well as harmful to the parent's marital relationship after a child's death. Five married couples that have experienced the death of a child were recruited to participate in a series of interviews from two local bereavement agencies, Calm Waters and Oklahoma Family Network. Using the phenomenological method, the researcher sought to gain further insight into their lived experience of support after their child's death as well as meaning the couples assigned to this support. The ABC-X Model by Reuben Hill was used to guide the literature review and findings for this study, where "A" was the non-normative stressor event, or death of a child, "B" was the couples resources,"C" was the couples' perception of the event, and finally, crisis, "X", or conflict in the relationship, would occur depending on the couples' perception of "C". Two common themes developed after reviewing the interview transcriptions and selective highlighting: Strengthened Marriage, and Tension and Conflict. A marriage was thought to strengthen with support that was perceived as beneficial, such as general support, incorporating the child, and seeking outside help. The opposite was true for tension in the relationship. Conflict was attributed to lack of communication about the child from others, family expectations, and lack of support. The couples mentioned that outside help was beneficial to their relationship, but that ultimately it was their choice to decide to get through the loss of their child together.

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